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“The fact of a couple moving quickly toward marriage is not in and of itself a problem as much as what is driving the speed.(The average length of courtships in the study was two years, four months)…Speed can become a problem when it is driven by romance and fantasy because, unless one is extraordinarily lucky, the suitors discover that the partner was not as lovely as they had imagined.We like each other’s circle of friends and regularly hang out with them, but also make them to see them separately.We are both 31 and I know for a fact I want to marry this amazing person.

marriage after 5 months of dating-21marriage after 5 months of dating-11

I know there are plenty of “is it too soon” posts on the internet but they are always a bit generic and don’t give context so would love to get your opinion:) (first time poster too!

Long courtships, Huston argues, are rarely long because the partners are exercising due caution.

If a couple is still finding lots of reasons not to marry after four or more years, then that’s usually because they’re subconsciously picking up on problems or even thinking that they themselves aren’t suitable for marriage, ever.” Makes perfect sense to me.

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I’ve been getting into it recently with some readers who have a slightly different take on when people should get engaged. One reader on my Facebook page wrote: “When a man’s in love he wants to propose as soon as he can.” Needless to say, I disagree with that. If you expect your marriage to be otherwise, you’ve got a big surprise waiting for you.




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Our writers explore and prepare you for the thoughts and feelings we all experience on our dating journey to keep things fun and interesting.